The author stares at his screen, the blinking cursor (how appropriate, he thought of the homonym) both a challenge and a threat…

He contemplates his self-inflicted befuddlement, his cup of procrastination nearly overflowing. “Hmmm”, he hums to himself in redundancy. “First person? Third person? Omnipresent? In what perspective does one write about himself?”. He knows that he is merely delaying the inevitable… perspective is, by far, the least of his problems. The crux of the matter lies in knowing that once he starts writing about himself, he may never, ever stop… and that the editor in his head will never stop heckling him, no matter what, and his penchant for using three dots to indicate a continuing thought was annoying spellcheckers everywhere, slowly killing him like stale air escaping from an over-driven truck tire down a strip of Interstate highway badly in need of repair…

Hi! (Lame. Even using an excalmation point won’t save your weak opening. -ed.)

My name is Bill (not exactly exciting). I’m a man in living in Great Falls, Montana (yawn). This isn’t my first blog but with some work, hopes to be my best (Great. Another geek with a blog. How f%#$&ing original… NOT!). I work for Vision Net in the NOC (Network Operations Center). It’s hard to describe exactly what I do on any given day. It might me hardware support, network problems, alarm monitoring, unjamming the printer, or authoring someone’s webpage, complete with graphics. (That doesn’t make you handy, it just means that you’re indecisive).

The Deets:

• Age: Between 40 and 45.
• Hometown: Manteca, CA
• How long at…